Quarantine update

“Tell me something good. I need to hear something good.” That was the message I left F some weeks ago. Because I needed – and still do – some good news in my life. I need something to go my way. Soon. I texted him as I was watching my grandma have the tea I’d […]

Losing an unloved one

My mom’s mother died on Monday, in her sleep, after a twelve-year fight against Alzheimer’s. She was ninety four and lived in the countryside. We weren’t very close. This is what I tell people. This is the official version, fit to print. Except it’s not true. I mean, the beginning is true enough. But to […]

I believe in the composition fairy

The composition fairy is the lesser known second cousin of the tooth fairy. Every night she roams around teachers’ homes. When it strikes her fancy, she flies in, bats her wings and supernaturally corrects compositions for some lucky teacher. Not only that, she also provides students with extensive feedback on both content and form, […]

A quarantine dream

In my dream you’re lying on the couch, your hair brushing my thigh as you sleepily browse through instagram pictures of friends I will never know except from the stories you tell me. And your feet are dangling off the couch arm as there’s clearly not enough room for you, but you twist and turn, […]

Where the f*ck is my wisdom?

This is life for you: you’re born, you struggle with the same issues your entire life, you die. Why the gloomy outlook, you ask? I’ve just spent the last hour looking for my students’ grades. I wrote them somewhere and I thought I had added them to the system, but apparently I haven’t. I’ve gone […]

A condescending inspirational message to my young students

Yesterday my grandma turned 93. My father’s mother, who helped raise me and who is responsible for the parts of me I’m most proud of, is now 93 years old. I couldn’t hug her, as she’s off in the countryside with my dad in quarantine. We did Skype, though, and I saw this brittle woman, […]

Thinking about thinking

Thinking too much. This morning F told me that quarantine has been forcing him into thinking too much. About who he is and his life and stuff. I just thought: that’s just a regular day for me. I’ve always thought too much. In fact, my brain is wired in such a way that I can […]

Life in quarantine (day 2)

I am an island, surrounded by fiction. I’m home alone, as my parents and grandmother are old and we’re fortunate enough to have more than one place we can hole up in. And truth be told, we’ve always been loners. We’ve always been a family of people stuck in their own heads. We love each […]

Fiction Heaven (new and hopefully improved)

This is what I think: perhaps there is no Heaven nor Hell. Perhaps when we die, we go to Fiction. Let’s face it: the concept of Heaven sounds much more appealing in theory than it would ever be in reality. It’s like you’ve made this huge effort to be admitted into this exclusive club, only […]

All quiet on the western front

I can’t stop thinking about F. I haven’t contacted him ever since my birthday, but it’s a constant struggle. Every second of every day I feel this impulse, this force that is trying to escape my every cell through my fingertips straight into a text message. I’ve been strong so far, but god knows how […]